Bentley Arnage

The Bentley Arnage is the last of a dying breed and with an inimitable charm that makes it hard to resist. It has flaws, but we don’t care.

• Comfort

  Sit back, relax, be transported to a time before the Blackberry was invented (the gadget, that is, not the fruit). Smoke a cigar that makes you sick, work on your gout with a few glasses of port. This is one of the most comfortable cars in existence. And it's big. Really big.

  

• Performance

  Be afraid. Be very afraid. The ‘base' Arnage can tear up the tarmac with the best of them. That 6.75-litre V8 is turbo'd. Twice. That'll be 336kW and 875Nm of torque, 0-100km/h in 5.8 seconds and on to 250km/h. The Arnage ‘T' has 373kW, 1000Nm, nips to 100km/h in just 5.5 and on to nearly 274km/h. And that's for something that's the size, shape and weight of a barn. Full of dead cows.

  

• Cool

  Possibly the coolest car in the world.

  

• Quality

  The Arnage is handbuilt by elves and has one of the most charismatic interiors of any car on the road and the experience is simply glorious. Sometimes they have electrical grumbles, but there are people that sort that kind of thing out. Poop, poop.

  

• Handling

  Surprisingly adept at flinging its massive bulk around the countryside, the Arnage may well surprise you with generous grip levels and tidy body control for such a big car. Get it wrong and it's a whopping great big hole in the hedge.

  

• Practicality

  You can pack a small country into an Arnage and have room for an island or two. They can be complete buggers to park, but get your man to do it.

  

• Running costs

  Hahahahahaahahaha. Ha. Sorry, this really is ‘ask: can't afford'. The Arnage ranges in price from $531,500 to $631,100. You'll be lucky to get litres per 100km under the twentys - they only quote 19.5L/100km on the combined cycle themselves.