Top Gear magazine’s Speed Week has been temporarily inconvenienced by an avalanche. It’s not a particularly impressive avalanche, and we’re probably being generous to describe what appears to be a relatively modest slump as a natural disaster, but technically the road is blocked because the mountain we’re driving on has shrugged a couple of thousand tonnes of last winter’s greyish slush all over itself. It is therefore, an avalanche, and we are summarily inconvenienced. There is a path past, but it involves rocks, fathomless mires and a great deal of freezing mud, and nobody fancies trying to force a McLaren P1 to off-road. The Caterham Seven 160 jounces merrily past, and ‘fathomless’ turns out to be about seven inches. I sigh. I have no idea what the Caterham is doing here. It has a blowing exhaust, we’ve lost the doors, and it won’t idle below 3,000rpm. The engine light blinks a baleful yellow eye almost permanently now, but like an annoying, part-crippled homing pigeon, it keeps appearing. Some time after the rest have arrived, granted, but the ergonomically inept little thing is like a bloody beige boomerang.
Photography: John Wycherley