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So, the weekend is nearly upon us and that means it’s almost time for another new Top Gear to stave off that Sunday evening feeling of Oh God, tomorrow I’ve got to return to work / school / international spying and playboyism.

You’ve probably already read the proper preview for this week’s show but here, in three words or less, is a quick summary of each element of Sunday’s programme:

Mercedes SL Black: Really excellent rubbish
Small cars test: Presenters almost arrested
Ken Block: James poos pants
Small cars test part 2: Very big dogs
Michael McIntyre: Funny and two-wheeled.

That last one might have been four words. Sorry. Do hyphens count?

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