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The third ford is the daddy - Packington in Warwickshire. I'll tell you now that fords four and five were slightly disappointing. Great Alne in Warwickshire was completely flooded, way too fast-flowing and deep. We took a quick photo of the sign, which said pointedly 'impassable at all times'.

Then ford five, at nearby Coughton, was another fast job, fabulous for big-wave action. But Packington was proper. You drive into and down a river. And yes, it is designated as a road. The first sight is horrific - the road drops into the river, wide and brown, and there's no evidence of an exit.

You have to walk 150 yards downstream to find the other side of the 'road', a shallow bank. Mike takes the Defender through first. It makes it, revving hard, but the water was at the top of its wheels, pushing even its limits. The depth is registering about 65cm on Mike's Staff of Death. He wields it like Gandalf the White, and his wizard-speak rings of truth:

"The river bed is solid enough. But if I was advising you, I'd say, 'don't do it'," he mutters. Then he grins. "But I can fully understand why you'd want to give it a go."

With a rope hitched to the Freelander's front towing eye and looped back onto the passenger seat (meaning I can pass it out, if I need to), I transfer my mobile phone from trouser pocket to shirt pocket and listen to Mike's final instructions. "Can you left-foot brake?" he asks.

"Yes."

"Good. Put the terrain response on grass/gravel/snow. Keep the revs up high to blow water out of the exhaust. Control your speed on the brakes. Start off dead slow, then build up speed to make a bow wave. Go quite fast and you should be fine."

Being a master driver, I pulled this off perfectly. But more impressive even than my amazing skill was the performance of the car. With the water up to the top of the tyres and a bow-wave forming ahead, the Freelander just drove through. Not a single droplet of water got by the front or rear door seals to dampen the carpet. Impressive. And the workings in the engine bay are clearly designed to cope with this sort of intrusion.

It's possible that any number of soft-roader 4x4s could have achieved the Packington feat, but I would never have attempted it in anything other than a Land Rover. With steam pouring from the underbonnet area as residual water was boiled off, the Freelander sat on the far side, proud and undaunted.

Puddle-splashing is fun, but driving in fully blown rivers is even better. It goes straight to equal number one on my chart of the best things to do in all of life. By the end of the day, I started to resent bridges.

"Would have made a perfectly good ford, that, what were they thinking?" I'd bark in anger, slowing the Freelander down and gazing at the flowing torrents beneath.

Bill Thomas

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