Features

Look at the pictures and tell me you haven't already formed at least an embryonic opinion of the VXR8, Vauxhall's four-door replacement for the Monaro coupe.

I'm guessing that you're probably already nursing some prejudices against fast Vauxhalls, be they anecdotal or from some unwary brush with a mid-Eighties Astra GTE. The thing is, though, despite the somewhat carefree attitude to elegance, VXR product is pretty much on the button when it comes to delivering on the visual aggression, and the VXR8 is no exception.

First let's discuss the way it looks. Personally (and this one is sure to divide opinion) I think it has an element of stumpiness despite it being quite a long car. It's certainly not pretty - the rear lights look too small in the context of a fairly high-waisted bodyshell and there's a fair bit of plastic filling in the gaps, especially around the front foglamps.

It looks heavy too; this is a car that makes its standard 19-inch alloys seem like trolley wheels (20s are better) and I imagine it has the ride and handling engineers reaching for the Anadin.

The rear wing size (massive) and position (slap bang in the centre of the rear windscreen) means you look into the plane of the foil, robbing you of about a third of your rearward vision, and the rear pipes look a bit weedy despite the fact there's a gang of four of them.

But it does look purposeful. Brutal even. If one steams up in your rearview mirror, I challenge you not to instinctively want to pull over and check there aren't bite marks in your rear bumper.

Enough about the subjective stuff, though, because this is a car with plenty of other gubbins to talk about if you're not convinced of its chest-wig first impression.

The nice surprises are easy to spot; this is the fourth generation of the LS2 5967cc V8 that sees duty in the later Monaro VXR and the Corvette. That means just over 400bhp and a slab of blood-raw torque, all driving through a six-speed manual transmission (an auto is a £1,400 option) via a limited-slip diff to the rear wheels.

We have four doors and a generous boot, as well as a much-improved and better-equipped interior. We have a 6.0-litre V8. We have more than 400bhp. I know, I mentioned them already, but the point was worth driving home.

We have all this for a smidge over £35k, or very roughly, half an M5. I'm not really going to compare the two in terms of quality and precision - I just wanted to make the point that here's a four-door-with-boot that's just as fast for 3-Series money.

The good news doesn't stop there. The new car gets blessedly comfy seats, fat enough to spend time in, tight enough to hold you in place when you start to chuck the car around - though personally I can do without the embroidered logo. Barely acceptable in the 80s, like Flock of Seagulls fringes and cocaine abuse, it's way out of fashion now.