And like its little sister, the RS4, the A8 is not cheap. Which brings us neatly onto a serious contender for the elusive complete-car title: Vauxhall's new VXR8.

I've argued in the past that a McMeal represents better value for money than anything else on earth. You get all you need for a balanced lunch - salad, bread and meat - and then they throw in a roof over your head, some utensils, a zesty drink and a free toy.

The only thing that comes close is a national newspaper. They amass stories from around the world, write them, take pictures, send it all off to a printer's and have the whole lot delivered to your doorstep, even if you live at the top of Scotland, the next day!

Obviously, the VXR8 costs more than 50p, but if you look at it in the context of its rivals, then it's a revelation. Because this 6.0-litre V8 saloon car produces 414 bhp - exactly the same as you get from an RS4. Yet, in round figures, it costs £15,000 less.

You look for any outward signs of where the savings might have been made and they're there all right. But you try putting your finger on them. You need to think of this car as an own-brand hi-fi. It's not as good as a Sony. You know that. But you don't know why.

What you do know is that here, for little money, is a fast, exciting saloon car that can take five people and their luggage. Except of course, it's as green as Michael Winner's face, it has fuel injectors like a line-up of firemen's hoses and when you park it, you find yourself hurrying off in case anyone thinks it's yours. Boris Johnson would call it vulgar. My children say its chavvy.

In some ways, the Golf GTI still has more of a claim to the title than most. And yet, when you stop and think, it's not complete at all. It isn't a convertible, for instance. And you can't take it across a muddy field. Not if you want to get to the other side.

What I'm looking for here is the automotive equivalent of my favourite European city, Biarritz. It's in France, which means it's beautiful but like you, most of the people there hate the French, because they're Basque. It's on the seaside which means you get a beach, which is relaxing, but the sea's full of waves which makes it exciting.

The food is... well, let me put it this way: Biarritz is a spit from Gascony, and that's the epicentre. And it doesn't cost a fortune to get there.