Husqvarna Nuda 900 R in the buff

And speaking of cardiovascular functions, the Nuda certainly causes a few missed beats. ‘Mad’ is the only word that applies here. The Nuda is a fine example of what happens when Italians have a go at origami, sitting in a room full of Transformers posters. “Ees sharpe, eet ’as an obviouse name-a and wee beat-a the Japanese-a againe!” The Nuda has as many curves as the girls who tend to hit on Abhinav (i.e. none at all), with one minor difference – the Nuda actually looks good. It’s far from skin and bone, this motorcycle.

Saying more with less, the Nuda is a haiku of eloquent minimalism (there’s a Japanese reference again...). It looks so tiny and light, there’s a good chance a gust of wind might take it away, were it not for those fat tyres anchoring it to terra firma. There’s a white plank at the rear, a black plank to sit on and a red plank to break the monotony – is what it seems like. However, get closer and you discover one delightful detail at a time – those were the squeaks you heard, guys.