Mercedes-Benz A180 Sport: Painting the night red

So then, the results are out. The 10th standard board exam results, I mean. And it’s the usual story. Girls have done better than boys. The number of students scoring above 90 per cent has increased. The number of students scoring over 95 per cent has increased even further. College admission cut-offs have gone up. And newspapers are filled with images of parents showering love on their high-scoring progeny. In fact, if they were not parents and their kids, the guardians of Indian culture would have called those photographs obscene and pelted stones at the newspaper office.

If the Indian car industry functioned like the Indian education system, the Mercedes A-Class would definitely not be this merit-list-topping kid. It costs Rs 23 lakh. This is not going to make it the teacher’s pet. With this price tag, it’s a five-door hatchback – enough for it to be relegated to the back benches. For all this money, it has a tiny 1.6-litre four-cylinder petrol engine: adequate reason for it to be called to the principal’s office. And unlike a typical Mercedes, it is not tremendously spacious at the back. Time to call the A’s parents and give them the, “Your kid will cause potential harm to our school’s board exam performance figures” spiel.