However, as I’m deep into a left-hand corner on the Monster, my peripheral vision picks up the GT650N’s front wheel pulling up alongside, threatening to overtake me. And on straights, the Harley – one cylinder of which is equal to two of the Ducati’s – more than kept up with me yet again. So there. Unfair fights can be so much fun. And if fights were won on looks alone, the Street Bob would stand over two red heaps holding a bloody sledgehammer. The Street Bob we have here is a factory custom and the theme is ‘brutal’, not ‘beautiful’. It’s got more skulls on it than in your average graveyard and the Street Bob displays them proudly, much like a headhunter would. It’ll make you want to wear black leather from head to toe, cover your arms with scary tattoos, get a few suitably unergonomic piercings and thunder across barren, empty landscapes till the end of time. Hardcore.

In comparison, the Monster 795, despite its rather intimidating name, looks positively dainty. It’s a ballerina to the Bob’s bar brawler, such is the Harley’s impact. However, I don’t know about you, but I’d rather keep gazing at a ballerina. The front-heavy stance seems to draw you near, while the minimalistic tail invites you to swing a leg over it. And enough has been said about the trademark trellis frame and that L-twin, so I won’t. What I will say is that the Ducati is my pick of the lot to paint the town red with.