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Tuned G-Wagen: squaring up

There aren’t many occasions in this life when a Maybach 62 isn’t enough. In fact, it’s usually far, far too much.

But, because you might one day find a six-metre long, V12-powered four-seater just a bit understated, a modified ‘Maybach 72’ - which, we must stress, is solely the work of after-market tuners - has popped up for sale on the internet.

Yes, it’s a stretched Maybach 62. Which is itself a stretched 57, which is itself a stretched Merc S-Class. So it’s slightly longer than Finland.

You do get six seats for the £500,000 asking price, though – two rear-facing affairs in the back now allow you to conduct completely legitimate and in no way shady business deals with three moustachioed colleagues on the way to your secret lair concealed within a volcano.

At least the mileage is decent: the car’s sellers – who, whether for reasons of taste of wishing to keep their kneecaps, are curiously anonymous – claim the 72 has just 500 miles on the clock.

OK, it’s ridiculous. But – and just humour us for a second here – imagine a one-make race series featuring, ooh, a dozen or so of these giant things. It’d be nearly as good as this…