Top Gear Speed Week: the misfits
Bowler EXR S, Vauxhall Maloo, Ford SuperSportVan, TG DeltaWang, McLaren GT and Honda race bike...
Posted: 30 Aug 2012
But it can. Keeping with the commercial-vehicle theme, next up is the Vauxhall Maloo. A pickup truck equipped with a 6.2-litre V8, 425bhp and 405lb ft. Like the Transit, it apparently serves no practical purpose other than to amuse, but, within a lap, I discover a strange side effect of the Maloo: it can change the weather. I found out by turning all the traction-control systems off and hoofing the throttle pedal while halfway around a corner. Turn, lift, stamp and, whump, you can create clouds. Big chewy, thick clouds of smoke, which dissipate into will-o'-the-wispy mist as the big yellow pickup flings itself off down another straight, making a noise like someone feeding Brian Blessed feet first into a woodchipper. Of course, I spun it eventually, and then translated a good few millimetres of high-quality performance tyre into the kind of walking-pace rolling burnout that leaves me hysterically chanting, "Maloo, Malooooo!" like an idiot, while people with racing licences merely point and tut.