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Opinion: the growing problem of indefinable cars

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Opinion: the growing problem of indefinable cars | Top Gear

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The way we categorise cars needs to change, says TGTV script editor Sam Philip

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Opinion: the growing problem of indefinable cars

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The way we categorise cars needs to change, says TGTV script editor Sam Philip

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Opinion: the growing problem of indefinable cars

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The way we categorise cars needs to change, says TGTV script editor Sam Philip

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Opinion: the growing problem of indefinable cars

# data.attributes.metatag[].attributes.content
Opinion: the growing problem of indefinable cars

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The way we categorise cars needs to change, says TGTV script editor Sam Philip

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If you’ve ever wondered what kind of crazy madcap capers go down in the TGTV office, last week we spent a solid hour debating how to categorise the Polestar 2. Life on the edge, us.

See, having been overtaken by a Polestar 2 the previous day, and noting with interest that its driver was sitting several feet higher than me in my Seat Leon, I was of the strong opinion that the award-winning Swedish EV was an SUV. My boss was of the equally strong opinion that the Polestar 2 was not an SUV but instead a hatchback, on account of it a) looking nothing like an SUV and b) having a hatchback. Others weighed in. Someone else suggested it might be a fastback. At one point the phrase ‘five-door coupe’ entered the conversation, despite definitely not being a thing. Matters became surprisingly heated, especially considering there was no debate to be had in the first place, what with the Polestar 2 obviously being an SUV.

It’s a growing problem, this. Indefinable cars. Take, for example, the Mercedes CLA Shooting Brake. It’s definitely not a shooting brake – far too many doors – but what is it? Saloon-estate? Wagon-coupe? Or what about the new Audi A7L? How, exactly, are you supposed to classify a saloon-based-on-a-hatchback-based-on-a-saloon? The entire filing system’s gone right up the swanny.

But, then again... so what? So what if a car doesn’t fit neatly into an existing category? If someone test drives a Polestar 2, and likes the Polestar 2, and thinks the Polestar 2 might be a good fit for whatever it is they want to do with a car, frankly it doesn’t matter a jot whether they think it’s an SUV or a hatchback or an African bull elephant named Hortensia. And it doesn’t matter what Top Gear, or Polestar, or anyone else thinks it is, either. All that matters is that it works for them.

Humans, we like tidiness and order. And it’s an enticing notion, filing the entire panoply of cars into a few boxes with nice simple labels on the front. But as any removals company will tell you, make your boxes too big, your labels too simple, you’re just creating headaches when it comes to unpacking.

So maybe let’s resist this compulsion to jam everything into a decades-old framework. Times change, life moves on. Much that was once regarded as binary, as black-and-white, has turned out to be far more fluid, far more nuanced, and all the better for it. Between black and white is a big old rainbow. (Apparently that’s not actually how physics works, but hey, it sounds nice so I’m keeping it.)

Which is to say: if a new thing doesn’t slot perfectly into a hoary old system of classification, that doesn’t mean there’s a problem with the new thing, that means there’s a problem with the system. Let’s find some new labels. Or, better still: forget the labels, throw out the filing cabinet and embrace life in its many and varied hues.

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If you’ve ever wondered what kind of crazy madcap capers go down in the TGTV office, last week we spent a solid hour debating how to categorise the Polestar 2. Life on the edge, us.

See, having been overtaken by a Polestar 2 the previous day, and noting with interest that its driver was sitting several feet higher than me in my Seat Leon, I was of the strong opinion that the award-winning Swedish EV was an SUV. My boss was of the equally strong opinion that the Polestar 2 was not an SUV but instead a hatchback, on account of it a) looking nothing like an SUV and b) having a hatchback. Others weighed in. Someone else suggested it might be a fastback. At one point the phrase ‘five-door coupe’ entered the conversation, despite definitely not being a thing. Matters became surprisingly heated, especially considering there was no debate to be had in the first place, what with the Polestar 2 obviously being an SUV.

It’s a growing problem, this. Indefinable cars. Take, for example, the Mercedes CLA Shooting Brake. It’s definitely not a shooting brake – far too many doors – but what is it? Saloon-estate? Wagon-coupe? Or what about the new Audi A7L? How, exactly, are you supposed to classify a saloon-based-on-a-hatchback-based-on-a-saloon? The entire filing system’s gone right up the swanny.

But, then again... so what? So what if a car doesn’t fit neatly into an existing category? If someone test drives a Polestar 2, and likes the Polestar 2, and thinks the Polestar 2 might be a good fit for whatever it is they want to do with a car, frankly it doesn’t matter a jot whether they think it’s an SUV or a hatchback or an African bull elephant named Hortensia. And it doesn’t matter what Top Gear, or Polestar, or anyone else thinks it is, either. All that matters is that it works for them.

Humans, we like tidiness and order. And it’s an enticing notion, filing the entire panoply of cars into a few boxes with nice simple labels on the front. But as any removals company will tell you, make your boxes too big, your labels too simple, you’re just creating headaches when it comes to unpacking.

So maybe let’s resist this compulsion to jam everything into a decades-old framework. Times change, life moves on. Much that was once regarded as binary, as black-and-white, has turned out to be far more fluid, far more nuanced, and all the better for it. Between black and white is a big old rainbow. (Apparently that’s not actually how physics works, but hey, it sounds nice so I’m keeping it.)

Which is to say: if a new thing doesn’t slot perfectly into a hoary old system of classification, that doesn’t mean there’s a problem with the new thing, that means there’s a problem with the system. Let’s find some new labels. Or, better still: forget the labels, throw out the filing cabinet and embrace life in its many and varied hues.

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The way we categorise cars needs to change, says TGTV script editor Sam Philip