Bingo wings: why the MkIV Renault Megane was a fail

In the main, there wasn’t much to hate about the MkIV Renault Megane. It drove nicely, came with a range of economical engines, wasn’t an SUV, and also wasn’t a Nissan Pulsar. On balance, solid effort from Renault.

But FOTC hasn’t stayed in business by embracing wishy washy concepts like ‘in the main’ or ‘on balance’. FOTC is petty and vindictive, and will remain so until someone finally makes one of those libel accusations stick.

The problem, then, with the MkIV Megane? That rear light signature: the meandering, glowing red strip stretching the width of its posterior. No doubt the designers intended this sweeping light motif to evoke, say, the silhouette of a majestic eagle in flight. Or perhaps the sturdy horns of an African buffalo. This was not the effect they achieved.

Because follow a Megane down the road at night, and all FOTC can think (and all you, too, will think after reading this sentence, sorry about that) is... bingo wings. You know the – how to put this? – dangly underarm sagginess suffered by those of a certain age? Those.

Not that there’s anything wrong with bingo wings. But FOTC suspects that wasn’t the vibe Renault designers were gunning for here. Vibes like ‘taut’ and ‘lithe’ and ‘fighter jet’? Designers like those. Vibes like ‘droopy’ and ‘dangly’ and ‘lightly atrophied’? Not so much.