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Ten Things We Learned This Week

  1. You should never ask the Stig to 'make progress' when he's chauffeuring you around

    The Stig doesn’t understand human emotions like ‘fear’ or ‘terror’. As TG mag’s Tom Ford found out while in the back of a Mercedes S-Class. A polite request to speed up while being driven by Stig resulted in… well, watch the video here and find out.

  2. If you are a schoolboy and get a VW logo shaved into the back of your head, you will be kicked out of class

    That’s the fate of 11-year old Zac Ecclestone who was taken out of classes and put into isolation at Camborne Science and International Academy in Cornwall, for not complying with school uniform rules. Presumably, the £15 haircut (£15?) was done to showcase Zac’s appreciation of the MQB platform.

    Source: SWNS

  3. There is a new British luxury automotive brand, wait, come back!

    “Successful British businessman and car enthusiast” David Brown has created his own car brand. It’s called David Brown, and will reveal a brand new production car later this year, currently codenamed “Project Judi”. No, it won’t be a car modelled in the fine form of Dame Judi, but rather a “completely original exterior and interior design”, with the “impact and style of a classic sports car but with modern capabilities and conveniences.” DENCH.

  4. Hamburg wants to become totally car free by 2034

    Clearly, the city of Hamburg HATES cars. This is all we can surmise after news of its urban development plan called ‘Green Network’ revealed a desire to ban all vehicles in the city centre in 20 years time. “We envision a network that doesn’t just help residents to get from point A to B in a sustainable fashion,” Hamburg city spokeswoman Angelika Fritsch told the ZME Science urban planning network. “It will offer people opportunities to hike, swim, do water sports, enjoy picnics, restaurants, experience calms and watch nature right in the city.”

    Right, right. But what about the opportunity to, y’know, not be stuck on a crowded bus in someone’s armpit? Or the opportunity to drive a V8?

    Source: The Independent

  5. Nissan's next GT-R will be quicker around the Nürburgring than the Porsche 918 Spyder and that terrifies us

    Nissan VP Andy Palmer told Top Gear that the next Nissan GT-R will be so fast, Porsche’s hybrid 918 hypercar - which clocked a stonking 6m 57s around the ‘Ring - won’t know which way to look. The current Nismo GT-R does the un-James May friendly benchmark in 7m 08s already, with some suggesting it could have gone even faster. God help us all.

  6. Big Ron is back in charge of the McLaren F1 team. All hail

    In a statement revealed this week, Ron Dennis has been re-appointed as CEO of the McLaren Group with immediate effect, to “improve its on-track and off-track performance”. No word on what’ll happen to current team principal Martin Whitmarsh, but Dennis promises to “win at whatever we do”. Can’t wait for the 2014 F1 season to begin? Yeah, us too.

  7. The Toyota FT-1 concept is a big, powerful, rear-wheel-drive supercar-shaped surprise

    Safe to say we didn’t see this one coming: with references to the 2000GT and a nod to the old Supra, the FT-1 concept unveiled in Detroit this week is an indication that Toyota wants to get sexy again. More of this, please Toyota.

  8. We cannot write a review of the Alfa Romeo 4C without provoking the ire of the Alfa Romeo 4C Unofficial Fan Club

    We drove the Alfa Romeo 4C in Italy last year. It had its flaws. We then drove it over here in Britain. It still had flaws. And some of you weren’t too happy about that, judging by the volume of comments.

  9. There won't be a Bugatti 'SuperVeyron' or a production version of the four-door Bugatti Galibier

    Bugatti President Wolfgang Schreiber exclusively revealed to Top Gear that the Galibier won’t ever see the light of production day, and that “1200PS is enough for the chapter of Veyron and its derivatives”. While this may come as Bad News for the VEYRON brigade, we’d be inclined to agree that yes, 268mph is actually more than fast enough. But - he’s already working on the next Veyron. “It will redefine the benchmarks,” Schreiber confirms. Watch out, world.

  10. Ostriches are really, really fast and will cause havoc on a country lane

    ‘Disgusted’ of Tunbridge Wells had more to complain about this week after a young Ostrich was spotted CAUSING TRAFFIC CHAOS as it sped along a village lane. Bemused drivers caught sight of the bird as it overtook their cars at over 40mph, providing yet more proof that these birds - with their ability to hit 60mph when adult - will somehow be the downfall of humankind. They sure know how to party, though.

    Source: Daily Telegraph

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