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Ten things we learned this week: 6 January 2017 edition
A new Huayra on the way, an electrifying Dakar and when adverts go wrong
An Austrian built an electric bike that looks like an irate ladybug
The electric revolution has been gaining momentum in motorbikes for a while now, but let's just say it's still cutting-edge enough to require some pretty avant-garde styling to get noticed.
The Johammer's main claim to fame – other than the bodywork, which looks a bit like an art-deco toaster – is its claimed range, finally topping the 200km mark. That's nearly 125 miles, which is quite a distance to go on a tiny battery pack.
The J1's electric motor is bolted to the rear wheel, leaving the space under the rider free for batteries, suspension components, and all the ancillaries.
Doing 75mph on battery-powered Tumi luggage looks like a hoot to us. Where do we sign?
Advertisement - Page continues belowThere still isn't anything funnier than a man falling over...
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... Provided, of course, that he's dressed in a bear costume, trying to advertise a car dealership.
There's an almost cartoonish level of slapstick on offer here, delivered by an unintentionally hilarious hero while trying to shoot a quick ad for local TV.
The lessons here? Well, the first is that mascot costumes don't work on ice rinks. The second is that it's still eye-wateringly, dry-retchingly, nose-snortingly amusing to watch people fall over.
Cadillac doesn't want you to buy its cars anymore
No, really. A new subsciption model, called 'Book', will allow access to the American luxury manufacturer's catalogue, without pesky leases or finance deals.
So it's basically Netflix for cars, except you can only drive Caddys, and it'll set you back 1,500 US dollars a month for the privilege. That's a fair chunk of change, but Cadillac will take care of the washing, servicing, detailing and everything else.
We're actually pretty well on board with the basic concept, especially if it was picked up by someone like JLR. A Range Rover for a spot of clay pigeon shooting in Scotland, then an F-Type R for a back-road blast in Wales, followed by an Evoque for a spot of shopping in Hampstead. Lovely.
Advertisement - Page continues belowParisians torched nearly 1,000 cars to celebrate the new year...
...Because nothing says 'Happy New Year' like an immolated Renault.
Burning cars on the street has been a bit of a yearly tradition for a few years now, but this year's total of 945 flame-grilled family cars is starting to get a little ridiculous.
Meanwhile, French authorities have, predictably, shrugged in a Gallic manner and said that “there were only a few troubles with public order.” Er, quite.
Photo: SpreeTom
Learner drivers could soon be on British motorways
In most civilised countries, and Australia, learner drivers are allowed to drive on national motorways as they take their trepidatious first steps from nascent motorist to tailgating menace.
In the UK, however, those with provisional licences have to be precluded from motorways – even if they're basically the same as a busy dual carriageway.
But not for much longer, if a government proposal goes through the consultation process. It should all shake out over the coming months, and pimply teens will soon take their parents' lives in their hands on the M11.
Photo: Tevjanphotos
And learner drivers of tomorrow won't actually... drive
“My own prediction is that kids born today will never get to drive a car.”
It's a pretty bold statement, but at least it's coming from a credible enough source. Professor at the University of California in San Diego, roboticist and man who should know what he's on about, Henrik Christensen, has said that the way we use cars will change so rapidly over the next 15 years that today's toddlers won't ever have cause to drive a car themselves.
“With autonomous, driverless cars, we can put twice as many vehicles on the road as we have today, and do it without improving the infrastructure,” said Christensen. “There would be no need to have parking garages. In theory, you’d get out of the car and say, ‘Pick me up at 4pm.’ Long-term — we’re talking 20 years into the future — you’re not even going to own a car. A car becomes a service.”
Of course, we think it's complete tosh. People are slow to embrace change, and not everyone lives on Blue Sky Thinking Boulevard, San Diego. And don't forget that there are still going to be proud Luddites who still think overhead cams are about as technical as they want a car to get.
Photo: Heatherton
Pagani teased its upcoming Huayra drop top...
... And this isn't a picture of it. Boo. That's because Pagani only released a picture of a wing mirror that says 'Roadster' on it. There's teasing, and then there's a picture of a wing mirror.
Honestly? The Huayra is so good, we'll forgive Pagani almost anything.
The real deal should show up at the Geneva Motor Show in March, with more photos likely to drop before then.
Advertisement - Page continues belowDakar 2017 is as bonkers as ever
There's no denying it: The Dakar Rally is brutal. Perhaps the ultimate test of machinery, engineering, willpower, stubborness, optimism and sanity, it's always throwing up new ways to test the mettle of competitors.
Doing more than 500 miles a day, across the toughest terrain the world has to offer, is just a taste of what Dakar can deliver. Threats include deadly sandstorms, terrorism and, now, lightning strikes.
Slovakian motorcyclist Ivan Jakes was struck about 180 miles from the finish line, which apparently caused a jolly serious pain in his left arm. Not enough to stop him finishing the race, mind. After crossing the line, he was checked over by doctors, who said that the bike itself may have saved his life, by acting as an earth for the immense current, rather than the 1.21 gigawatts or so coursing through his body.
So, there are even more lessons on offer this week. One: Dakar competitors are the only thing more mental than Dakar itself, and two: motorcycling saves lives. Nice.
Photo: Frederic Le Floch
Honda made a self-balancing motorbike
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Yes, we're pretty heavy on motorbikes this week, but come on – this is amazing.
As any rider will know, the slower you go on two wheels, the harder it is to keep everything in control and stay upright. That's because the stabilising gyroscopic force only works at speed – without it, you're at the whim of gravity again.
That said, have you ever seen a trials motorcyclist (or a pushbike courier) move the bike's front wheel left and right to stay upright without having to put their feet down? It's a neat trick that changes the centre of gravity of the bike repeatedly, staying one fragile step in front of gravity.
Well, Honda's new electronic system does much the same thing, only with the speed and finesse that can only come with gigaflops of processing power. It can also increase the rake of the front forks – pushing the front wheel out from the body – which increases stability.
The upshot is that, should the system make it to production bikes, complete numpties will be able to manoeuvre at low speed, without the fear of dropping 200-odd kilos of motorcycle. Hardened, grizzled bikers might scoff at the idea, but imagine how much more attractive an option riding would be to the less-skilled and less-experienced riders, who are a bit scared of the idea of crashing? And then think of the effect in major cities – more space to park, smaller traffic snarls and less fuel burnt in the process. We're on board.
Advertisement - Page continues belowFiat took its 124 Abarth to Monte Carlo for old-school rear-drive fun...
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... And quite a bit of exhaust parping, thanks to what sounds a lot like a rally-spec anti-lag system. Being a rally car, it would make sense for rally tech to find its way under the bonnet though, wouldn't it?
Even so, the anti-lag doesn't seem to be enough to overcome the whacking great turbocharger, with the test driver falling off boost more than once on the frigid stage roads of Monte Carlo. So it's properly old-school, then – with a huge, laggy turbo, rear-wheel drive and an Abarth sticker on the back. Yes, please.
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