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Yikes, it's a Gumball 3000 Alfa Romeo Stelvio

The Gumball rally goes on a stag do-esque tour, with a lurid Alfa SUV in tow

Gumball 3000. An infamous – perhaps notorious – event that sees beautiful hypercars daubed in dubious stickers and colours for a hedonistic blast from one part of the world to another.

This year, it’s going on something of a lads lads lads stag do tour, starting at Mykonos and ending in Ibiza. Amidst all of that is a slightly more cultured sounding jaunt from Venice to Monaco, and Alfa Romeo is kindly opening up the Fiat group’s Balocco proving ground to the string of supercars between the two.

Thus there’s a special Alfa to mark the occasion, and while Gumball lore would seem to naturally invite some kind of spectacular one-off 8C-based supercar few prying eyes had seen before, the truth is a little more prosaic. Alfa has made a Gumball Stelvio Quadrifoglio.

Yep, its 503bhp super SUV has been luridly liveried up, with a staid black base colour overlaid with much green, the company’s famed cloverleaf and snake logos painted fluorescently complemented by surely the least tasteful wheels to ever adorn an Alfa. At the back, there are new lights that appear to doff a baseball cap to the Lexus light craze of the mid-2000s.

Still, there’s no denying its aesthetic is fully in keeping with the cavalcade of cars this Stelvio joins for the Europe-wide party. Like it?

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