Christian Horner set to return to F1 in 2026 with new ‘Bed Rull’ team

Here’s TopGear.com’s roving correspondent, Cory Spondent, with his mostly incorrect exclusives from the world of motoring

Christian Horner is set to return to Formula One in 2026 with a new team called ‘Bed Rull F1’, TopGear.com understands.

And sources close to the ousted team principal claim he’s already found a future world champion driver in the unheralded and entirely unknown ‘Vax Merstappen’.

When pushed on the optics of returning to a sport he was very publicly outed from, a spokesperson for Horner’s new project said: “Red who?

“Oh, right. Christian never really liked them anyway and he’s already forgotten about them and rarely thinks about them and has found something way, way better already and honestly it rarely comes up because he’s totally forgotten who they are and is totally focused on controlling every single aspect of his new team that’s nothing like the old one he can’t remember.”

When pressed on the physical similarities between Horner and Merstappen, the spokesperson said: “They’re two entirely different people. Look, one of them wears his cap backwards and this one’s got a cool French alter ego. And he’s much better at videogames than that other guy- I mean, any other random driver.”

And when pushed on the physical similarities between Horner and Bed Rull F1’s unknown new technical director N’drian Huey, the spokesperson said: “Huey’s got a moustache and bears a genius-level talent able to vocalise a V6’s internal combustion rhythm with his throat and therefore maximise horsepower better than that other guy- I mean, any other totally random engineer with a bit of experience.”

On Bed Rull F1’s second driver, the spokesperson added: “We’re piloting an AI robot pre-programmed to consistently finish outside of the points in every race next season. And no, it doesn’t look and sound suspiciously like Christian.”