Diesel prices skyrocket as charity shops report mass panic buying of DVDs

Here’s TopGear.com’s roving correspondent, Cory Spondent, with his mostly incorrect exclusives from the world of motoring

A misunderstanding on a global scale has led to unprecedented demand for old DVDs featuring Hollywood actor Vin Diesel.

Charity shops across the UK have reported pandemonium in high street stores, with customers queuing around the block and in some cases literally fighting for the chance to plunder second-hand media shelves.

Meanwhile several of those charities have been criticised for using controversial dynamic pricing methods, with sticker price increases of almost 600 per cent meaning some used copies of Furious 7 are now changing hands for as much as £3.

Virtually everything in Vin Diesel’s back catalogue is thought to have been affected, with even widely panned titles such as Babylon A.D., The Last Witch Hunter and The Pacifier generating interest not seen since the famously deep-voiced actor did a round of late night talk shows to promote them.

An eleventh installment of the Fast & Furious franchise titled Fast Forever was set to be released in 2028, but that could now be brought forward to this summer with insiders confident that “finishing the script by next week and shooting everything within a month won’t damage the quality of the film”.

A spokesperson for Universal, which owns the Fast & Furious series, said: “You don’t need to read more than the headline when you got family.”