Duct tape better than anything on Earth, all of motorsport confirms

Duct tape is better than literally anything on planet Earth, the entire world of motorsport has agreed.

Following the frenzied application of gaffer tape to Yuki Tsunoda’s AlphaTauri mid-race at the Baku Grand Prix, scores of motorsport insiders have come forward to confirm that literally nothing is as satisfying as a good bit of sticky tape.

Despite spending billions on research and development, deploying space-age materials and employing thousands of highly trained engineers in order to run a season of racing, the comical application of a bit of strong tape is in fact peak motorsport.

“We’ve spent decades using wind tunnels, processing complicated aerodynamic data and installing really posh materials to make our bespoke racing cars that little bit faster,” a team insider said. “It’s fun, but not as fun as slapping on a good bit of sticky tape."

Reports from teams across the globe confirmed that the feverish deployment of duct tape to fix a broken part during a race not only boosted social media activity to hitherto unseen levels, but was mainly just enormously satisfying.

“We bless it with magic,” a duct tape producer confirmed. "That's why parcel tape is only good for cardboard. Although apparently it's all Williams can afford right now."

Meanwhile, unconfirmed reports suggest Lewis Hamilton is using gaffer tape to repair his shattered spine.