Dacia Jogger review

Very little, considering. You’ve got three trims to choose from – Essential, Expression and Extreme – and it’s the first one that makes the ‘cheapest seven-seater in the UK’ headline. Prices for this car, available only with a 1.0-litre manual, start from. £18,995. This gives you pretty much everything you need from A Big Family Car.

Want a teeny bit of comparative luxury? Fork out an additional £1,300 to step up to the same engine in Expression trim (£20,295). Want the hybrid Expression? That’ll cost you £23,330. On this mid-tier, you get body-coloured handles and mirrors, a shark-fin antenna, roof bars, climate control, keyless entry, a touchscreen, and parking sensors.

And if I want even MORE stuff?

Go for the Extreme trim, which – for £21,595 in 1.0-litre guise, or £24,630 in 1.8-litre hybrid form – adds in copper brown accents, 16in black alloys, folding mirrors, ‘MicroCloud’ upholstery with copper stitching, heated seats, a heated steering wheel, rubber floor mats and a better Arkamys six-speaker stereo. There’s even wireless charging for your phone, a surround camera, and lots of assists.

Nobody pays outright anymore. What am I looking at per month?

True dat. On Dacia’s online configuratoriser, it’s £219 per month with a £2,762 deposit for the base 1.0-litre Essential – your coffee and avocado spend, surely – rising to £269 per month with a £3,104 deposit for the top-spec Extreme hybrid version. That’s at 7.4 per cent APR.