Smashed Lexus LS400 in Streetfighter II passes 23rd consecutive MOT

Here’s TopGear.com’s roving correspondent, Cory Spondent, with his mostly incorrect exclusives from the world of motoring

The smashed, beaten up and vandalised Lexus LS400 from Streetfighter II has passed its 23rd consecutive MOT, sources have revealed.

Despite 23 years of being hundred-hand-slapped and hadoukened into total oblivion, the big, luxury Japanese saloon – long considered to be one of the most reliable cars in the world – has once again sailed through its annual roadworthiness check with no major advisories.

The owner – a salesman who originally left it parked on a portside back in 1991 in the hope a group of seasoned, cartoonishly proportioned international warriors would destroy it with their bare hands – is now planning an international road trip.

“Over two decades of spinning bird kicks and electric thunder and yoga flames and sonic booms and that thing the Japanese chap does in the air with his legs that nobody can pronounce, and look – the bloody thing still works,” the owner told TopGear.com.

“What a joke. Not one of the world’s greatest martial artists could get rid of a 23-year-old entirely forgettable luxury Japanese saloon; not even enough to make the MOT tester give it a cursory ‘light misting of oil on nearside shock absorber’ advisory.

“It’s true: the Lexus LS400 is quite simply indestructible. I think I’ll go on a nice international road trip. To Japan. And maybe China. India’s nice this time of year. I hear great things about Brazil. Just throwing places out there, y’know?”

However, the salesman’s plans were dashed upon starting the LS400 in preparation for his road trip and hearing an uncomfortable noise from under the bonnet.

“Typical. A spinning piledriver couldn’t put this thing out of action, but a bloody starter motor dying on me can.

“Per-fect.”