‘Just kidding!’ says Jaguar

Here’s TopGear.com’s roving correspondent, Cory Spondent, with his mostly incorrect exclusives from the world of motoring

Jaguar has revealed it was ‘only joking’ after its radical rebrand and the hugely anticipated public debut of its Type 00 concept car.

Following a new advertising campaign that has somehow managed to capture global attention – and completely distance itself from its entire back catalogue – the British carmaker has revealed the whole thing wasn’t meant to be taken all that seriously.

“Woah, just kidding!” an insider close to the campaign revealed. “Thought we’d brighten up the end of a miserable year with a light-hearted prank, but yeesh, things appear to have gotten a trifle out of hand.

“We thought you’d smell a ruse when we announced ‘Exuberant Modernism’ as our catchphrase and then went on to unleash a cartoonishly proportioned GT that wouldn’t look out of place in that Nineties Batman cartoon.

“Somehow, you swallowed it up. It’s a bit troubling, if we’re honest.

“We even told you to forget what came before… and then reminded you we used to build the E-Type. Even that didn’t ring any alarm bells.”

The insider later admitted the next all-new electric Jaguars would in fact take the form of a mildly facelifted F-Type with a massive battery shoved under the bonnet provisionally named FE-Type, a small run of hydrogen-fuelled continuation XJS models dubbed H-Type, and a load of restomodded C-Types with modern supercharged V8s.

“We’re just gonna keep playing all the stone-cold classics until this entire lark falls in on itself. It’s what the public wants,” the insider added, with a sigh.